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war is real

unconcerned, uncompromised and unconvoluted letters from a soldier getting ready to face war for the second time. 

Friday, May 20, 2005

4:00 PM -

i just realized that there's a lot that the army has in common with "the shawshank redemption."

typically, i'd be excited right now. or drunk. or excited, and well on my way to being drunk. it's friday night, after all, and i should be planning an entire weekend of doing nothing and sitting on my ass. instead, we have to report in to work tomorrow because the rest of our unit is in the field and so thus we have to work. nevermind the fact that the rest of the entire division doesn't train on the weekends. we're different because we're hardcore, i guess.

those of you emailing ptsd links to me...thanks, but i've already gotten a ton of information on it, and i'm in a support group, and nothing really helps. even zoloft. to all you soldiers coming home from iraq...don't let them put you on zoloft. it steals your soul.

Blogger Janie said...

Maybe nothing helps, especially right now...

Just know many, many of us here at home care what happens to the Soldier before and after the deployment.  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hope things get better for you. Maybe you can converse with Smink at In Iraq for 365. He's been having reocurring nightmares and has gotten some help from a counsellor. http://desert-smink.blogspot.com/ he has some great writings as well.

Thanks for everything you do, for the sacrafices that you make, including your piece of mind. We have a young Marine in our church who wasnt in for more than 2-3 years and spent a year in Iraq. He had problems when he came home and instead of the Marines spending money to help him, they gave him an early discharge. He's kind of vaige on the details, but that his choice. Time will heal most wounds.  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Zoloft does steal your soul. I'm not in the military, so maybe I'm not so on point here, but I am chronically depressed and have taken many medications for it. And, while I can't empathise with a jot of that through which you are going, I am touched by your words, and I am grateful to hear someone else state that Zoloft steals your soul. Really, seriously.  

Anonymous Timothy McCormick said...

Hey Dude, hang in there, PTSD is bitch (I've got her myself ... )

I don't want to come across as a lofty and "iknowtheanswers" sort of person. But from what I experienced, the best way to get better is to take it very easy a few years. never took any medicine to help me. (I experience medicine as something that just suppresses everything and let's it simmer until it boils.)

You should really not go back to iraq ... ever. (Within this wartime, that is.) Not sure how possible it is, but unless you stop being exposed to traumatizing shit, it's not going to get much better. (In fact it will probably get worse.)

I don't know about your options, or if you even want to not go back to iraq. (If you don't want to go back, say fuck it and don't. It will help you a lot. No matter how it will effect your carreer) But i would strongly reccomend not ever being put in a situation that gives you similar experiences.

Time and rest is the best way to recover, a slow daily rythem that keeps you going. It is not easy, hell it's hard. But you can do it. (Nothing is uncurable, it just takes a bit of time. I personally have a few years to go before I can function normally.)

I really hope things get better for you and that you can avoid serving again so you can recover properly. I'm not american, but i do give a damn about what happens to you soldiers, american or whatever nationality you happen to be.

Sorry about the slightly confusing comment, but my english is appalingly rusty. Anyway:

hang in there, rest and recover, You can do it! :) when shit pops up in your mind, work through it (instead of taking pills to push it away.) and keep on recovering. :) The only thing that can really help you is time and peace! So give yourself what you need.

All the best!
-Tim (17)

PS: A pet can help alot, so if you can, get a cat or a dog. (Or another animal you like.)You wouldn't believe how much they support you and comfort you. :)

PPS: No matter what people say, keep telling yourself that you will recover, keep going and you will manage it!  

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